首发偶发空缺 (临时空缺)-第28部分

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had　described　with　ical　disgust　during　yesterday’s　English　lesson。　It　would　have　been　like　interrupting　his　friend　having　a　crap。

As　Andrew　cycled　slowly　around　the　Square；　he　slicked　his　hair　back　off　his　face　with　one　hand；　wondering　what　the　cold　air　had　done　to　his　purple…red　acne　and　whether　the　anti…bacterial　face　wash　had　done　anything　to　soothe　the　angry　look　of　it。　And　he　told　himself　the　cover　story：　he　had　e　from　Fats’　house　（which　he　might　have　done；　there　was　no　reason　why　not）；　which　meant　that　Hope　Street　was　as　obvious　a　route　down　to　the　river　as　cutting　through　the　first　side　street。　Therefore　there　was　no　need　for　Gaia　Bawden　（if　she　happened　to　be　looking　out　of　the　window　of　her　house；　and　happened　to　see　him；　and　happened　to　recognize　him）　to　think　that　he　had　e　this　way　because　of　her。　Andrew　did　not　anticipate　having　to　explain　to　her　his　reason　for　cycling　up　her　street；　but　he　still　held　the　fake　story　in　his　mind；　because　he　believed　it　gave　him　an　air　of　cool　detachment。

He　simply　wanted　to　know　which　was　her　house。　Twice　already；　at　weekends；　he　had　cycled　along　the　short　terraced　street；　every　nerve　in　his　body　tingling；　but　he　had　been　unable；　as　yet；　to　discover　which　house　harboured　the　Grail。　All　he　knew；　from　his　furtive　glimpses　through　the　dirty　school…bus　windows；　was　that　she　lived　on　the　right　hand　even…numbered　side。

As　he　turned　the　corner；　he　tried　to　pose　his　features；　acting　the　part　of　a　man　cycling　slowly　towards　the　river　by　the　most　direct　route；　lost　in　his　own　serious　thoughts；　but　ready　to　acknowledge　a　classmate；　should　they　show　themselves　…

She　was　there。　On　the　pavement。　Andrew’s　legs　continued　to　pump；　though　he　could　not　feel　the　pedals；　and　he　was　suddenly　aware　how　thin　the　tyres　were　on　which　he　balanced。　She　was　rummaging　in　her　leather　handbag；　her　copper…brown　hair　hanging　around　her　face。　Number　ten　on　the　door　ajar　behind　her；　and　a　black　T…shirt　falling　short　of　her　waist；　a　band　of　bare　skin；　and　a　heavy　belt　and　tight　jeans　…　when　he　was　almost　past　her；　she　closed　the　door　and　turned；　her　hair　fell　back　from　her　beautiful　face；　and　she　said；　quite　clearly；　in　her　London　voice；　‘Oh；　hi。’

‘Hi；’　he　said。　His　legs　kept　pedalling。　Six　feet　away；　twelve　feet　away；　why　hadn’t　he　stopped？　Shock　kept　him　moving；　he　dared　not　look　back；　he　was　at　the　end　of　her　street　already；　for　fuck’s　sake　don’t　fall　off；　he　turned　the　corner；　too　stunned　to　gauge　whether　he　was　more　relieved　or　disappointed　that　he　had　left　her　behind。

Holy　shit。

He　cycled　on　towards　the　wooded　area　at　the　base　of　Pargetter　Hill；　where　the　river　glinted　intermittently　through　the　trees；　but　he　could　see　nothing　except　Gaia　burned　onto　his　retina　like　neon。　The　narrow　road　turned　into　an　earthy　footpath；　and　the　gentle　breeze　off　the　water　caressed　his　face；　which　he　did　not　think　had　turned　red；　because　it　had　all　happened　so　quickly。

‘Fucking　hell！’　he　said　aloud　to　the　fresh　air　and　the　deserted　path。

He　raked　excitedly　through　this　magnificent；　unexpected　treasure　trove：　her　perfect　body；　revealed　in　tight　denim　and　stretchy　cotton；　number　ten　behind　her；　on　a　chipped；　shabby　blue　door；　‘oh；　hi’；　easily　and　naturally　–　so　his　features　were　definitely　logged　somewhere　in　the　mind　that　lived　behind　the　astonishing　face。

The　bike　jolted　on　the　newly　pebbly　and　rough　ground。　Elated；　Andrew　dismounted　only　when　he　began　to　overbalance。　He　wheeled　the　bicycle　on　through　the　trees；　emerging　onto　the　narrow　riverbank；　where　he　slung　the　bicycle　down　on　the　ground　among　the　wood　anemones　that　had　opened　like　tiny　white　stars　since　his　last　visit。

His　father　had　said；　when　he　first　started　to　borrow　the　bike：　‘You　chain　it　up　if　you’re　going　in　a　shop。　I’m　warning　you；　if　that　gets　nicked　…’

But　the　chain　was　not　long　enough　to　go　around　any　of　the　trees　and；　in　any　case；　the　further　he　rode　from　his　father　the　less　Andrew　feared　him。　Still　thinking　about　the　inches　of　flat；　bare　midriff　and　Gaia’s　exquisite　face；　Andrew　strode　to　the　place　where　the　bank　met　the　eroded　side　of　the　hill；　which　hung　like　an　earthy；　rocky　cliff　in　a　sheer　face　above　the　fast…flowing　green　water。

The　narrowest　lip　of　slippery；　crumbling　bank　ran　along　the　bottom　of　the　hillside。　The　only　way　of　navigating　it；　if　your　feet　had　grown　to　be　twice　the　length　they　had　been　when　they　had　first　made　the　trip；　was　to　edge　along　sideways；　pressed　to　the　sheer　face；　holding　tight　to　roots　and　bits　of　protruding　rock。

The　mulchy　green　smell　of　the　river　and　of　wet　soil　was　deeply　familiar　to　Andrew；　as　was　the　sensation　of　this　narrow　ledge　of　earth　and　grass　under　his　feet；　and　the　cracks　and　rocks　he　sought　with　his　hands　on　the　hillside。　He　and　Fats　had　found　the　secret　place　when　they　were　eleven　years　old。　They　had　known　that　what　they　were　doing　was　forbidden　and　dangerous；　they　had　been　warned　about　the　river。　Terrified；　but　determined　not　to　tell　each　other　so；　they　had　sidled　along　this　tricky　ledge；　grabbing　at　anything　that　protruded　from　the　rocky　wall　and；　at　the　very　narrowest　point；　clutching　fistfuls　of　each　other’s　T…shirts。

Years　of　practice　enabled　Andrew；　though　his　mind　was　barely　on　the　job；　to　move　crab…wise　along　the　solid　wall　of　earth　and　rock　with　the　water　gushing　three　feet　beneath　his　trainers；　then　with　a　deft　duck　and　swing；　he　was　inside　the　fissure　in　the　hillside　that　they　had　found　so　long　ago。　Back　then；　it　had　seemed　like　a　divine　reward　for　their　daring。　He　could　no　longer　stand　up　in　it；　but；　slightly　larger　than　a　two…man　tent；　it　was　big　enough　for　two　teenage　boys　to　lie；　side　by　side；　with　the　river　rushing　past　and　the　trees　dappling　their　view　of　the　sky；　framed　by　the　triangular　entrance。

The　first　time　they　had　been　here；　they　had　poked　and　dug　at　the　back　wall　with　sticks；　but　they　had　not　found　a　secret　passageway　leading　to　the　abbey　above；　so　they　gloried　instead　in　the　fact　that　they　alone　had　discovered　the　hiding　place；　and　swore　that　it　would　be　their　secret　in　perpetuity。　Andrew　had　a　vague　memory　of　a　solemn　oath；　spit　and　swearwords。　They　had　called　it　the　Cave　when　they　had　first　discovered　it；　but　it　was　now；　and　had　been　for　some　time　past；　the　Cubby　Hole。

The　little　recess　smelt　earthy；　though　the　sloping　ceiling　was　made　of　rock。　A　dark　green　tidemark　showed　that　it　had　flooded　in　the　past；　not　quite　to　the　roof。　The　floor　was　covered　in　their　cigarette　butts　and　cardboard　roaches。　Andrew　sat　down；　with　his　legs　dangling　over　the　sludge…green　water；　and　pulled　his　cigarettes　and　lighter　out　of　his　jacket；　bought　with　the　last　of　his　birthday　money；　now　that　his　allowance　had　been　stopped。　He　lit　up；　inhaled　deeply；　and　relived　the　glorious　encounter　with　Gaia　Bawden　in　as　much　detail　as　he　could　ring　out　of　it：　narrow　waist　and　curving　hips；　creamy　skin　between　leather　and　T…shirt；　full；　wide　mouth；　‘oh；　hi’。　It　was　the　first　time　he　had　seen　her　out　of　school　uniform。　Where　was　she　going；　alone　with　her　leather　handbag？　What　was　there　in　Pagford　for　her　to　do　on　a　Saturday　morning？　Was　she　perhaps　catching　the　bus　into　Yarvil？　What　did　she　get　up　to　when　she　was　out　of　his　sight；　what　feminine　mysteries　absorbed　her？

And　he　asked　himself　for　the　umpteenth　time　whether　it　was　conceivable　that　flesh　and　bone　wrought　like　that　could　contain　a　banal　personality。　It　was　only　Gaia　who　had　ever　made　him　wonder　this：　the　idea　of　body　and　soul　as　separate　entities　had　never　once　occurred　to　him　until　he　had　clapped　eyes　on　her。　Even　while　trying　to　imagine　what　her　breasts　would　look　and　feel　like；　judged　by　the　visual　evidence　he　had　managed　to　gather　through　a　slightly　translucent　school　shirt；　and　what　he　knew　was　a　white　bra；　he　could　not　believe　that　the　allure　she　held　for　him　was　exclusively　physical。　She　had　a　way　of　moving　that　moved　him　as　much　as　music；　which　was　what　moved　him　most　of　all。　Surely　the　spirit　animating　that　peerless　body　must　be　unusual　too？　Why　would　nature　make　a　vessel　like　that；　if　not　to　contain　something　still　more　valuable？

Andrew　knew　what　naked　women　looked　like；　because　there　were　no　parental　controls　on　the　puter　in　Fats’　conversion　bedroom。　Together　they　had　explored　as　much　online　porn　as　they　could　access　for　free：　shaven　vulvas；　pink　labia　pulled　wide　to　show　darkly　gaping　slits；　spread　buttocks　revealing　the　puckered　buttons　of　anuses；　thickly　lipsticked　mouths；　dripping　semen。　Andrew’s　excitement　was　underpinned；　always；　by　the　panicky　awareness　that　you　could　only　hear　Mrs　Wall　approaching　the　room　when　she　reached　the　creaking　halfway　stair。　Sometimes　they　found　weirdness　that　made　them　roar　with　laughter；　even　when　Andrew　was　unsure　whether　he　was　more　excited　or　repulsed　（whips　and　saddles；　harnesses；　ropes；　hoses；　and　once；　at　which　even　Fats　had　not　managed　to　laugh；　close…ups　of　metal…bolted　contraptions；　and　needles　protruding　from　soft　flesh；　and　women’s　faces　frozen；　screaming）。

Together　he　and　Fats　had　bee　connoisseurs　of　silicone…enhanced　breasts；　enormous；　taut　and　round。

‘Plastic；’　one　of　them　would　point　out；　matter　of　factly；　as　they　sat　in　front　of　the　monitor　with　the　door　wedged　shut　against　Fats’　parents。　The　on…screen　blonde’s　arms　were　raised　as　she　sat　astride　some　hairy　man；　her　big　brown…nippled　breasts　hanging　off　her　narrow　rib　cage　like　bowling　balls；　thin；　shiny　purple　lines　under　each　of　them　showing　where　the　silicone　had　been　inserted。　You　could　almost　tell　how　they　would　feel；　looking　at　them：　firm；　as　if　there　were　a　football　underneath　the　skin。　Andrew　could　imagine　nothing　more　erotic　than　a　natural　breast；　soft　and　spongy　and　perhaps　a　little　springy；　and　the　nipples　（he　hoped）　contrastingly　hard。

And　all　of　these　images　blurred　in　his　mind；　late　at　night；　with　the　possibilities　offered　by　real　girls；　human　girls；　and　the　little　you　managed　to　feel　through　clothes　if　you　managed　to　move　in　close　enough。　Niamh　was　the　less　pretty　of　the　Fairbrother　twins；　but　she　had　been　the　more　willing；　in　the　stuffy　drama　hall；　during　the　Christmas　disco。　Half　hidden　by　the　musty　stage　curtain　in　a　dark　corner；　they　had　pressed　against　each　other；　and　Andrew　had　put　his　tongue　into　her　mouth。　His　hands　had　inched　as　far　as　her　bra　strap　and　no　further；　because　she　kept　pulling　away。　He　had　been　driven；　chiefly；　by　the　knowledge　that　somewhere　outside　in　the　darkness；　Fats　was　going　further。　And　now　his　brain　teemed　and　throbbed　with　Gaia。　She　was　both　the　sexiest　girl　he　had　ever　seen　and　the　source　of　another；　entirely　inexplicable　yearning。　Certain　chord　changes；　certain　beats；　made　the　very　core　of　him　shiver；　and　so　did　something　about　Gaia　Bawden。

He　lit　a　new　cigarette　from　the　end　of　the　first　and　threw　the　butt　into　the　water　below。　Then　he　heard　a　familiar　scuffling；　and　leaned　forward　to　see　Fats；　still　wearing　his　funeral　suit；　spread…eagled　on　the　hill　wall；　moving　from　hand…hold　to　hand…hold　as　he　edged　along　the　narrow　lip　of　bank；　towards　the　opening　where　Andrew　sat。

‘Fats。’

‘Arf。’

Andrew　pulled　in　his　legs　to　give　Fats　room　to　climb　into　the　Cubby　Hole。

‘Fucking　hell；’　said　Fats；　when　he　had　clambered　inside。　He　was　spider…like　in　his　awkwardness；　with　his　long　limbs；　his　skinniness　emphasized　by　th