little dorrit-信丽(英文版)-第66部分

快捷操作: 按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页 按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页 按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部! 如果本书没有阅读完，想下次继续接着阅读，可使用上方 "收藏到我的浏览器" 功能 和 "加入书签" 功能！

and　I　find　no　improvement　in　it。　Therefore　to　have　the　opportunity　of
speaking　to　one　so　well　informed　about　it　as　yourself；　is　an　immense
relief　to　me。　Quite　a　boon。　Quite　a　blessing；　I　am　sure。'

'Pardon　me；'　returned　Clennam；　'but　I　am　not　in　Mr　Henry　Gowan's
confidence。　I　am　far　from　being　so　well　informed　as　you　suppose　me　to
be。　Your　mistake　makes　my　position　a　very　delicate　one。　No　word　on　this
topic　has　ever　passed　between　Mr　Henry　Gowan　and　myself。'

Mrs　Gowan　glanced　at　the　other　end　of　the　room；　where　her　son　was
playing　ecarte　on　a　sofa；　with　the　old　lady　who　was　for　a　charge　of
cavalry。

'Not　in　his　confidence？　No；'　said　Mrs　Gowan。　'No　word　has　passed　between
you？　No。　That　I　can　imagine。　But　there　are　unexpressed　confidences；　Mr
Clennam；　and　as　you　have　been　together　intimately　among　these　people；　I
cannot　doubt　that　a　confidence　of　that　sort　exists　in　the　present　case。
Perhaps　you　have　heard　that　I　have　suffered　the　keenest　distress　of
mind　from　Henry's　having　taken　to　a　pursuit　which……well！'　shrugging　her
shoulders；　'a　very　respectable　pursuit；　I　dare　say；　and　some　artists
are；　as　artists；　quite　superior　persons；　still；　we　never　yet　in　our
family　have　gone　beyond　an　Amateur；　and　it　is　a　pardonable　weakness　to
feel　a　little……'

As　Mrs　Gowan　broke　off　to　heave　a　sigh；　Clennam；　however　resolute　to
be　magnanimous；　could　not　keep　down　the　thought　that　there　was　mighty
little　danger　of　the　family's　ever　going　beyond　an　Amateur；　even　as　it
was。

'Henry；'　the　mother　resumed；　'is　self…willed　and　resolute；　and　as　these
people　naturally　strain　every　nerve　to　catch　him；　I　can　entertain　very
little　hope；　Mr　Clennam；　that　the　thing　will　be　broken　off。　I　apprehend
the　girl's　fortune　will　be　very　small；　Henry　might　have　done　much
better；　there　is　scarcely　anything　to　pensate　for　the　connection：
still；　he　acts　for　himself；　and　if　I　find　no　improvement　within　a　short
time；　I　see　no　other　course　than　to　resign　myself　and　make　the　best　of
these　people。　I　am　infinitely　obliged　to　you　for　what　you　have　told
me。'　As　she　shrugged　her　shoulders；　Clennam　stiffly　bowed　again。　With　an
uneasy　flush　upon　his　face；　and　hesitation　in　his　manner；　he　then　said
in　a　still　lower　tone　than　he　had　adopted　yet：

'Mrs　Gowan；　I　scarcely　knoyself　of　what　I　feel　to　be　a
duty；　and　yet　I　must　ask　you　for　your　kind　consideration　in
attempting　to　discharge　it。　A　misconception　on　your　part；　a　very　great
misconception　if　I　may　venture　to　call　it　so；　seems　to　require　setting
right。　You　have　supposed　Mr　Meagles　and　his　family　to　strain　every
nerve；　I　think　you　said……'

'Every　nerve；'　repeated　Mrs　Gowan；　looking　at　him　in　calm　obstinacy；
with　her　green　fan　between　her　face　and　the　fire。

'To　secure　Mr　Henry　Gowan？'

The　lady　placidly　assented。

'Now　that　is　so　far；'　said　Arthur；　'from　being　the　case；　that　I　know
Mr　Meagles　to　be　unhappy　in　this　matter；　and　to　have　interposed　all
reasonable　obstacles　with　the　hope　of　putting　an　end　to　it。'

Mrs　Gowan　shut　up　her　great　green　fan；　tapped　him　on　the　arm　with　it；
and　tapped　her　smiling　lips。　'Why；　of　course；'　said　she。　'Just　what　I
mean。'

Arthur　watched　her　face　for　some　explanation　of　what　she　did　mean。

'Are　you　really　serious；　Mr　Clennam？　Don't　you　see？'

Arthur　did　not　see；　and　said　so。

'Why；　don't　I　know　my　son；　and　don't　I　know　that　this　is　exactly　the　way
to　hold　him？'　said　Mrs　Gowan；　contemptuously；　'and　do　not　these　Miggles
people　know　it；　at　least　as　well　as　I？　Oh；　shrewd　people；　Mr　Clennam：
evidently　people　of　business！　I　believe　Miggles　belonged　to　a　Bank。　It
ought　to　have　been　a　very　profitable　Bank；　if　he　had　much　to　do　with　its
management。　This　is　very　well　done；　indeed。'

'I　beg　and　entreat　you；　ma'am……'　Arthur　interposed。

'Oh；　Mr　Clennam；　can　you　really　be　so　credulous？'

It　made　such　a　painful　impression　upon　him　to　hear　her　talking　in　this
haughty　tone；　and　to　see　her　patting　her　contemptuous　lips　with　her
fan；　that　he　said　very　earnestly；　'Believe　me；　ma'am；　this　is　unjust；　a
perfectly　groundless　suspicion。'

'Suspicion？'　repeated　Mrs　Gowan。　'Not　suspicion；　Mr　Clennam；　Certainty。
It　is　very　knowingly　done　indeed；　and　seems　to　have　taken　YOU　in
pletely。'　She　laughed；　and　again　sat　tapping　her　lips　with　her　fan；
and　tossing　her　head；　as　if　she　added；　'Don't　tell　me。　I　know　such
people　will　do　anything　for　the　honour　of　such　an　alliance。'

At　this　opportune　moment；　the　cards　were　thrown　up；　and　Mr　Henry　Gowan
came　across　the　room　saying；　'Mother；　if　you　can　spare　Mr　Clennam　for
this　time；　we　have　a　long　way　to　go；　and　it's　getting　late。'　Mr　Clennam
thereupon　rose；　as　he　had　no　choice　but　to　do；　and　Mrs　Gowan　showed　him；
to　the　last；　the　same　look　and　the　same　tapped　contemptuous　lips。

'You　have　had　a　portentously　long　audience　of　my　mother；'　said　Gowan；　as
the　door　closed　upon　them。　'I　fervently　hope　she　has　not　bored　you？'

'Not　at　all；'　said　Clennam。

They　had　a　little　open　phaeton　for　the　journey；　and　were　soon　in　it　on
the　road　home。　Gowan；　driving；　lighted　a　cigar；　Clennam　declined　one。　Do
what　he　would；　he　fell　into　such　a　mood　of　abstraction　that　Gowan　said
again；　'I　am　very　much　afraid　my　mother　has　bored　you？'　To　which　he
roused　himself　to　answer；　'Not　at　all！'　and　soon　relapsed　again。

In　that　state　of　mind　which　rendered　nobody　uneasy；　his　thoughtfulness
would　have　turned　principally　on　the　man　at　his　side。　He　would　have
thought　of　the　morning　when　he　first　saw　him　rooting　out　the　stones　with
his　heel；　and　would　have　asked　himself；　'Does　he　jerk　me　out　of　the
path　in　the　same　careless；　cruel　way？'　He　would　have　thought；　had　this
introduction　to　his　mother　been　brought　about　by　him　because　he　knew
what　she　would　say；　and　that　he　could　thus　place　his　position　before
a　rival　and　loftily　warn　him　off；　without　himself　reposing　a　word　of
confidence　in　him？　He　would　have　thought；　even　if　there　were　no　such
design　as　that；　had　he　brought　him　there　to　play　with　his　repressed
emotions；　and　torment　him？　The　current　of　these　meditations　would　have
been　stayed　sometimes　by　a　rush　of　shame；　bearing　a　remonstrance　to
himself　from　his　own　open　nature；　representing　that　to　shelter　such
suspicions；　even　for　the　passing　moment；　was　not　to　hold　the　high；
unenvious　course　he　had　resolved　to　keep。　At　those　times；　the　striving
within　him　would　have　been　hardest；　and　looking　up　and　catching　Gowan's
eyes；　he　would　have　started　as　if　he　had　done　him　an　injury。

Then；　looking　at　the　dark　road　and　its　uncertain　objects；　he　would　have
gradually　trailed　off　again　into　thinking；　'Where　are　we　driving；　he
and　I；　I　wonder；　on　the　darker　road　of　life？　How　will　it　be　with　us；　and
with　her；　in　the　obscure　distance？'　Thinking　of　her；　he　would　have　been
troubled　anew　with　a　reproachful　misgiving　that　it　was　not　even　loyal　to
her　to　dislike　him；　and　that　in　being　so　easily　prejudiced　against　him
he　was　less　deserving　of　her　than　at　first。

'You　are　evidently　out　of　spirits；'　said　Gowan；　'I　am　very　much　afraid
my　mother　must　have　bored　you　dreadfully。'　'Believe　me；　not　at　all；'
said　Clennam。　'It's　nothing……nothing！'




CHAPTER　27。　Five…and…Twenty

A　frequently　recurring　doubt；　whether　Mr　Pancks's　desire　to　collect
information　relative　to　the　Dorrit　family　could　have　any　possible
bearing　on　the　misgivings　he　had　imparted　to　his　mother　on　his　return
from　his　long　exile；　caused　Arthur　Clennam　much　uneasiness　at　this
period。　What　Mr　Pancks　already　knew　about　the　Dorrit　family；　what　more
he　really　wanted　to　find　out；　and　why　he　should　trouble　his　busy　head
about　them　at　all；　were　questions　that　often　perplexed　him。　Mr　Pancks
was　not　a　man　to　waste　his　time　and　trouble　in　researches　prompted　by
idle　curiosity。　That　he　had　a　specific　object　Clennam　could　not　doubt。
And　whether　the　attainment　of　that　object　by　Mr　Pancks's　industry　might
bring　to　light；　in　some　untimely　way；　secret　reasons　which　had　induced
his　mother　to　take　Little　Dorrit　by　the　hand；　was　a　serious　speculation。

Not　that　he　ever　wavered　either　in　his　desire　or　his　determination　to
repair　a　wrong　that　had　been　done　in　his　father's　time；　should　a
wrong　e　to　light；　and　be　reparable。　The　shadow　of　a　supposed　act
of　injustice；　which　had　hung　over　him　since　his　father's　death；　was
so　vague　and　formless　that　it　might　be　the　result　of　a　reality　widely
remote　from　his　idea　of　it。　But；　if　his　apprehensions　should　prove　to
be　well　founded；　he　was　ready　at　any　moment　to　lay　down　all　he　had；　and
begin　the　world　anew。　As　the　fierce　dark　teaching　of　his　childhood　had
never　sunk　into　his　heart；　so　that　first　article　in　his　code　of　morals
was；　that　he　must　begin；　in　practical　humility；　with　looking　well　to
his　feet　on　Earth；　and　that　he　could　never　mount　on　wings　of　words　to
Heaven。　Duty　on　earth；　restitution　on　earth；　action　on　earth；　these
first；　as　the　first　steep　steps　upward。　Strait　was　the　gate　and　narrow
was　the　way；　far　straiter　and　narrower　than　the　broad　high　road　paved
with　vain　professions　and　vain　repetitions；　motes　from　other　men's　eyes
and　liberal　delivery　of　others　to　the　judgment……all　cheap　materials
costing　absolutely　nothing。

No。　It　was　not　a　selfish　fear　or　hesitation　that　rendered　him
uneasy；　but　a　mistrust　lest　Pancks　might　not　observe　his　part　of　the
understanding　between　them；　and；　making　any　discovery；　might　take　some
course　upon　it　without　imparting　it　to　him。　On　the　other　hand；　when　he
recalled　his　conversation　with　Pancks；　and　the　little　reason　he　had　to
suppose　that　there　was　any　likelihood　of　that　strange　personage　being
on　that　track　at　all；　there　were　times　when　he　wondered　that　he　made　so
much　of　it。　Labouring　in　this　sea；　as　all　barks　labour　in　cross　seas；　he
tossed　about　and　came　to　no　haven。

The　removal　of　Little　Dorrit　herself　from　their　customary　association；
did　not　mend　the　matter。　She　was　so　much　out；　and　so　much　in　her　own
room；　that　he　began　to　miss　her　and　to　find　a　blank　in　her　place。　He　had
written　to　her　to　inquire　if　she　were　better；　and　she　had　written
back；　very　gratefully　and　earnestly　telling　him　not　to　be　uneasy　on　her
behalf；　for　she　was　quite　well；　but　he　had　not　seen　her；　for　what；　in
their　intercourse；　was　a　long　time。

He　returned　home　one　evening　from　an　interview　with　her　father；　who　had
mentioned　that　she　was　out　visiting……which　was　what　he　always　said
when　she　was　hard　at　work　to　buy　his　supper……and　found　Mr　Meagles　in　an
excited　state　walking　up　and　down　his　room。　On　his　opening　the　door；　Mr
Meagles　stopped；　faced　round；　and　said：

'Clennam！……Tattycoram！'

'What's　the　matter？'

'Lost！'

'Why；　bless　my　heart　alive！'　cried　Clennam　in　amazement。　'What　do　you
mean？'

'Wouldn't　count　five…and…twenty；　sir；　couldn't　be　got　to　do　it；　stopped
at　eight；　and　took　herself　off。'

'Left　your　house？'

'Never　to　e　back；'　said　Mr　Meagles；　shaking　his　head。　'You　don't　know
that　girl's　passionate　and　proud　character。　A　team　of　horses　couldn't
draw　her　back　now；　the　bolts　and　bars　of　the　old　Bastille　couldn't　keep
her。'

'How　did　it　happen？　Pray　sit　down　and　tell　me。'

'As　to　how　it　happened；　it's　not　so　easy　to　relate：　because　you　must
have　the　unfortunate　temperament　of　the　poor　impetuous　girl　herself；
before　you　can　fully　understand　it。　B